2013 is here and one of my new years resolutions is to Live it up, and be more confident in myself and not scared. Just do it.

I'm currently in my high school basketball, On the jr varsity girls, but one of the better players not to try and sound cocky.

In late november I was feeling almost like, done. Exhausted with basketball and had not as much intrest to play it. Maybe high school sports aren't just cut out for me and i'm not on the level i should be mentaly. I always have sometimes been a pussy when i was too scared to do something out of my comfort zone, or embarassed and try to wiggle myself out of something till my confidence is back up. Cheating. I feel like a really bad team mate for doing this but I said i tore a legament in my thumb which no i have not but i planned that in the 2 weeks of the season i'd be off, I would work hard so when I come back I'd be better which made the guilt go away. I barely touched a basketball that 2 weeks, and now it's winter break. I started off good but when christmas hit i became lazy. I'm trying to get back for the remaining 5 days to how I started this break. 

Then I pussied out again. I was too scared to play infront of my boyfriend who would see on the week we get back and play, and told my coach today that I cant play for another 2 weeks, so about a week and a half into the season i can't play. 

Great start to the new year...not. 

Someone please help me, this holds me back in things I do daily and I know the only person stopping me is myself but I need to get a grip of myself with this. 

Thankyou for reading, happy new year everyone hope you had a great first day to start the year.

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