2003/05/14, 03:06 PM
On this day in 1878, the Chesebrough Ponds company launches Vaseline brand petroleum jelly. Within months, even your own sainted great-great grandmother was giving anal sex a try.
On the first day of their honeymoon, the blonde bride slipped into a sexy but sweet nightie and with great anticipation, crawled into bed, only to find that her new Catholic husband had settled down on the couch.
When she asked him why he was apparently not going to make love to her, he replied: "Because it's Lent."
Almost in tears, she remarked: "Well, that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard! Who did you lend it to, and for how long?"
George Bush goes up to Superman and says: "Hey Superman! How come you didn't save the astronauts when the Space Shuttle was about to blow up?"
Superman looks up at him and replies: "Listen you prick, I'm in a fucking wheelchair."
My husband, not happy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods. When I'm in a good mood it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood it leaves a big fuckin' red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond !!!!
May 14
-------------- "Get everthing you want--just make a little change now"
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2003/05/14, 03:16 PM
:o) Very cute...just what I needed today. Thanks.
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2003/05/14, 03:41 PM
LMAO! I just emailed the mood ring joke to my wife. Dinner will be on me tonight!
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2003/05/14, 05:44 PM
Good stuff, :)
-------------- I will lift my own weight someday!!!!!
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2003/05/16, 09:57 AM
don't want to spoil the fun or anything, but i really wasn't feeling that joke with the astronauts and superman...!
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Quoting from INTRUDER:
George Bush goes up to Superman and says: "Hey Superman! How come you didn't save the astronauts when the Space Shuttle was about to blow up?"
Superman looks up at him and replies: "Listen you prick, I'm in a fucking wheelchair."
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2003/07/08, 12:01 AM
Message deleted by moderator due to unsuitable content for this board.
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2003/07/08, 11:21 AM
GOWAR, what the....? That's probably better left unsaid.
-------------- OSU Law Rugby....specializing in personal injury and pain & suffering.
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2003/07/08, 01:14 PM
I thought the same thing, but noticed the word was used in the original post and not deleted so.....?
-------------- ~Victoria~
...There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.--Beverly Sills
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