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what to do...

shorty692003 Posts: 18 Joined: 2004/04/20	2004/06/08, 12:30 PM My husband competited in a bodybuilding competition last weekend, he promised me he would train me..now he wants to do another competition and he say's I have to wait for him to train me..what should I do?
hecdarec Posts: 2,457 Joined: 2003/12/16	2004/06/08, 12:43 PM Wait for him to train you or go train on your own. -------------- Would it be classified as overly competitive if I refused to let a 4 year old beat me at chutes and ladders?
DanielJLove Posts: 320 Joined: 2004/03/30	2004/06/08, 12:52 PM Shorty, It can be very frustrating when a spouse doesn't hold up on thier end of a deal. Don't let that effect your goals. There is a lot of good information on this site and a lot of literature out there. I am not sure of your current fitness level, but the best thing you is take ownership of it and get to where you want to be. I know that while I was waiting for my wife to work with me, I gained 20lbs. Finally, I said to hell with it and just did it. What a relief. Get going, Daniel Love
Philia2 Posts: 4,078 Joined: 2001/10/19	2004/06/09, 01:52 AM When you compete you don't really have time or energy to something else. Don't blame him but start to act on your own. Get all the needed informations and start to train yourself. Good luck! -------------- - Nina :o) Les Victoires éternelles sont celles du coeur. www.nme-pro.com
Datdanigirl Posts: 452 Joined: 2004/02/11	2004/06/09, 04:03 PM Yep.. you can do this yourself, with the support of all of us here at ft. Then when he has the time to train with you, you'll be so much farther along already, it won't be starting from scratch!
princesslodgey Posts: 1,748 Joined: 2004/02/21	2004/06/10, 09:12 AM Am I the only person here who thinks that the husband is out of order to PROMISE to help with training and then go back on his word? I think that shows a lack of respect, you should kick his a**:angry:
Datdanigirl Posts: 452 Joined: 2004/02/11	2004/06/10, 09:57 AM You are right Princess, that it is not right; but I try to put things in a 'what can "I" do' perspective... we can only control our own actions, so take control! Let him know you don't appreciate him making promises he can't keep, but don't let his actions (or inaction) keep you from doing something for yourself.
shorty692003 Posts: 18 Joined: 2004/04/20	2004/06/10, 10:24 AM Thanks princess...He was training me until he decided to compete...I have been the one doing all the leg work, helping with the diet and every other aspect including all the prep for the competition. I feel deep down that since I've lost about 30lb's and gained atleast 5lb's of muscle he does not want me to go to the gym or lose any more weight ..I think he is worried that other men will be interested in me...I am only 5'2 and weigh 128lb's. My goal is to weigh 125lb's...I feel lost some times... Shorty ============ Quoting from princesslodgey: Am I the only person here who thinks that the husband is out of order to PROMISE to help with training and then go back on his word? I think that shows a lack of respect, you should kick his a**:angry: =============
princesslodgey Posts: 1,748 Joined: 2004/02/21	2004/06/10, 11:03 AM I'm sorry you're feeling like this. Focusing on yourself and your own training should help you feel less lost, but it sounds like you guys need to talk to each other about this?
DanielJLove Posts: 320 Joined: 2004/03/30	2004/06/10, 11:18 AM Princess, No your not the only one. I think he should keep his promise, but if he doesn't she shouldn't suffer. With the encouragement of the the FT community I am sure she can reach her goals. Daniel
shorty692003 Posts: 18 Joined: 2004/04/20	2004/06/10, 11:43 AM Thanks Daniel & Princess...I've talked to him about this situation many many times...ever since I've lost the weight and when we go out alot of men look at me, I'm not saying that I have a great body but put me in a pair of jeans and a tight shirt and I look pretty good. I know he loves me and I think deep down he wants me to be fat so that no one will want me. Last nite I asked him again and he said that he will start this weekend...Lets see how this goes. The last time he told me this, he did'nt exercise all weekend or he would go to the gym when I was out....Thank for all your support. Shorty ============ Quoting from princesslodgey: I'm sorry you're feeling like this. Focusing on yourself and your own training should help you feel less lost, but it sounds like you guys need to talk to each other about this? =============
princesslodgey Posts: 1,748 Joined: 2004/02/21	2004/06/13, 02:54 PM shorty, did your man help train you this weekend?
shorty692003 Posts: 18 Joined: 2004/04/20	2004/06/14, 11:57 AM Hi Princess...no he didn't train me this weekend...He left for the gym on sat at 10am and didn't return until 4pm...I am going to the gym myself tonite..and I have decided that I don't need him...in the gym or at home! Shorty ============ Quoting from princesslodgey: shorty, did your man help train you this weekend? =============
princesslodgey Posts: 1,748 Joined: 2004/02/21	2004/06/14, 11:59 AM You go for it! If he won't help you WE will :)
shorty692003 Posts: 18 Joined: 2004/04/20	2004/06/14, 12:06 PM Thanks for all your support...I will let you know how it goes tonite...Shorty ============ Quoting from princesslodgey: You go for it! If he won't help you WE will :) =============
	2004/06/14, 12:10 PM Amen highness. Go for it shorty. You're the one you're doin' it for anyway. ============ Quoting from princesslodgey: You go for it! If he won't help you WE will :) ============= -------------- Foolish consistancies are the hobgoblins of small minds. Charlie