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2004/07/07, 04:39 PM
Okay, I had to vent. I'm seeing great results, thanks to everyone's advice and my efforts, but I also get a lot of comments from friends and family saying that maybe I'm taking things to the extreme. I started from 28% body fat and after about 3 weeks of religiously monitoring my diet and exercise, I dropped down to 26% body fat, lost about 2 inches on my waist and I'm seeing the definitions in my arms, I'm also seeing my abs peeking through. Apart from that, I feel great. I just ignore them and go through my day and train hard.
But it just pisses me off so much that they can't cheer me onwards, like having a piece of cake would keep the stress at bay, and cooking me unsuitable lunch. It's just soooooooo irritating to have to reiterate again and again that..."no..I'm making my own lunch...no I already ate...yes, I need to go to the gym...yes, I'm sleeping fine..." *sigh* I just don't wanna hurt them, but I don't want them to think that I'm obsessed as well.
Sorry :( needed to vent. cupcakes do lose their tempers ya know..
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The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it.
-cupcake-
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2004/07/07, 04:53 PM
I've heard that when some people (family and friends) aren't ready to make the same changes as you, they will saboutage (sp?) what you, or the so-called obsessed person is doing.... I think I heard that from Dr. Phil... the friends and family don't want to be left behind...
To me, that makes sense... I'd just tell them how you feel, that you are on a path to health and they can join you if they so choose... if not, move on and focus on what you're goals are...
t
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Tim
I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies, for the hardest victory is over self. - Aristotle
You have the power to change a life right in your own hands. - Paul Brandt
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2004/07/07, 05:14 PM
I ditto, Tim's post. Cupcake, sometimes it is just hard for people to see someone succeeding and working hard at their goals when they cannot bring themselves to do it, or they are not ready to see a new you. I've had girlfriends that would do everything to keep me from the gym years ago, "skip the gym, let's go out to eat or the bar", my own husband recently made the comment, "you aren't going to leave me when you get thin?" HELLO?! People do things for strange reasons, but you sound like you are taking control of your life where others may not be able to make that step or are willing to see you do so as they may feel that there won't be room for them any longer. As Tim said, tell them your honest feelings and ask for their support.
Personally, I think you are a wonderful person with great attitude from what I see on these forums. Wishing you the best...
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Veda
MISERY IS OPTIONAL
***When you are up to your ears in trouble, try using the part that is not submerged.
***The difference between a dream and a goal is a plan.
HAVE A GREAT DAY!
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2004/07/07, 07:57 PM
thanks Tim and veda. I think you both are right though, it's like having me change so fast made them a bit conscious of their own habits and how much I'm changing, and those changes might leave them in an unsecure place. Instead of lazing about, I work out, instead of submerging myself into all those bad habits, I'm living a fuller life by taking care of myself and treating myself right.
Sometimes it's so easy to just let go, but I don't want to see all that I've worked for just slip when I'm on the way to getting to my goals. They will have to just bear it because I'm not giving this up. They just made my goals a whole lot more attractive, and made me a whole lot more determined.
some of my friends actually dropped in and paraded a six pack in front of me as a gift :laugh: How weird is that? Like I'd give in for beer? HAH!
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The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it.
-cupcake-
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2004/07/07, 08:09 PM
babe...yes, I am obsessed...well no...26% says that I'm moderately overweight. :P you might be saying obese godlike. thanks for making me laugh sweets :big_smile:
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The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it.
-cupcake-
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2004/07/07, 08:11 PM
I am convinced the only six pack I will ever have will come in a Budwieser box... hahaha.. I like beer far too much... I don't over indulge, but I've resigned myself to the fact that's the six pack I will have! haha...
t
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Quoting from the_cupcake:
thanks Tim and veda. I think you both are right though, it's like having me change so fast made them a bit conscious of their own habits and how much I'm changing, and those changes might leave them in an unsecure place. Instead of lazing about, I work out, instead of submerging myself into all those bad habits, I'm living a fuller life by taking care of myself and treating myself right.
Sometimes it's so easy to just let go, but I don't want to see all that I've worked for just slip when I'm on the way to getting to my goals. They will have to just bear it because I'm not giving this up. They just made my goals a whole lot more attractive, and made me a whole lot more determined.
some of my friends actually dropped in and paraded a six pack in front of me as a gift :laugh: How weird is that? Like I'd give in for beer? HAH!
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Tim
I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies, for the hardest victory is over self. - Aristotle
You have the power to change a life right in your own hands. - Paul Brandt
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2004/07/07, 08:27 PM
Don't worry tim, next time they get me another sixpack, I'm gonna send it to you ;)
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The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it.
-cupcake-
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2004/07/07, 08:28 PM
one day i will have a six pack instead of looking like i drank the keg...
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i wish you ill, ice-t.
margarine is a liar who announces, \"i am butter!\"
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2004/07/07, 09:09 PM
Congrats on doing such a great job, Cupcake, in 3 weeks time!! Like Tim and Veda said previously it's sometimes hard for friends and family to be as supportive as you'd like them to be. I've had my fair share of it from my family too because they don't think that I need to lose any weight. They don't think that I need to be so concerned with my body. Although very frustrating as you know, improving ourselves is only going to happen through ourselves, with or without support. It'd be nicer with support. Maybe once they see that you are indeed going to keep it up they'll be more willing to support you.
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Do just once what others say you can't do, and you will never pay attention to their limitations again.
James R. Cook
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2004/07/07, 10:49 PM
Stay strong, cupcake, send the beer a'packin' to Tim! *wink*
You know, cupcake, the thing I noticed most is that people don't say anything to me about losing, they just don't acknowledge it like it would be too much a compliment or something?? I know I'm only 9 pounds down - but that and a 17.5" loss adds up to some changes for those closer to me, especially in my face, but acquaintances just ignore it, even when they know how hard I am working...then again, maybe they don't want to come out and say, "hey, looks like your losing weight" as then that would mean I needed to, like I didn't know that!! Like phimugirl1 said, it's going to happen through ourselves, and I am thrilled with the small changes and look forward to more - you have that same right, you enjoy how good you feel and how healthy you are becoming, an added bonus would be that others follow suit or at least don't keep putting beer in your face! ;)
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Veda
MISERY IS OPTIONAL
***When you are up to your ears in trouble, try using the part that is not submerged.
***The difference between a dream and a goal is a plan.
HAVE A GREAT DAY!
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2004/07/08, 07:37 AM
thanks for the kind words everyone :) I really appreciate it. And when I feel down, I just peek in these forums and get find my motivation instantly.
Cheers!
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The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it.
-cupcake-
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2006/01/25, 01:52 AM
Hmmmm, my husband and I have been going through a difficult time... he actually said - "I dont want you to lose weight and get hot before you leave me... Please do it before you leave me" HA thats not why I am here though.... I am here for myself (and my 20yr HS reunion) :)
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2006/01/25, 08:27 AM
cupcake just stay strong, and after a while everyone will view your new lifestyle as normal behavior. Everyone is resistant to change and disruptions in someone's normal behavior, because it can often times (not always) be a signal that an underlying driving force is present. Good luck with your goals, and just keep yourself on a healthy plan to reach them.
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2006/01/25, 07:33 PM
Gangster makes a good point cupcake, sometimes people do view a change in the norm as unusual and believe it will pass and think you'll end up being the same person you always were(hope that's the point you were making gangster) but what you need to do is stay focused and remember who your doing this for...you, end of story. When support is needed, come here, it always boost my spirits. I'm trying alot harder now to give back more than I recieve but it's tough because the people here really are great when it comes to support because most people on the outside don't want to commit themselves to a lifestyle change this demanding to be who they really want to be.
Anyway getting long winded again. Main point is stay focused, your doing this for you, be proud of it. When I get rolling I take great pride in the fact that I am ultamately the one doing all the work, people will notice wether they say anything or not, and you will know this just by the way you are treated. As time goes by you'll be more and more proud and when you do need encouragement just ask...it's always here.
Good luck!
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Seize the day!
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2006/01/26, 04:04 AM
That post is 1.5 years old....I am not even sure if she still visits the forum...
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2006/01/26, 03:32 PM
I never thought to look at the thread start date. Good observation menace.
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2006/01/26, 10:55 PM
Ditto...duh...which way did he go george?
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Seize the day!
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