|
2004/10/28, 01:41 PM
A thread has been going in another forum and I thought I would throw it out to you guys and ask for brutal honesty if you can afford it....(I know you can, Hec, show 'em how to do it!)
Let's see...how do I put this.........if you love an overweight woman do you think about her extra pounds when you are...well...you know, making love, since men are more aroused with "visuals", is this something that interfers with your thoughts and libido? I ask because I, personally, am very self-concious of my weight and I think I let it interfere too much...but don't let my insecurities stop you from answering honestly, you can't make me feel worse than I already do...maybe I am just asking for a load of trouble but I guess I'd rather know some opinions on this matter and I don't want to ask my husband and call more attention to the matter!
(and Charlie, I am still a believer, I believe you to be right...!)
|
|
|
|
2004/10/28, 02:51 PM
Whether your partner is male or female, looks are what attract but they aren't the reason people love us. My man loves me because I'm intelligent and I'm fun. He will tell you without hesitation that he is more physically attracted to me when I'm thin than when I'm round, but he likes thin women. If he preferred heavy women, that's what he'd go get. It doesn't make him bad and it doesn't make me bad. I'm honestly more likely to pursue him when he is slim, but it won't make me love him more. Physical attraction and love aren't the same thing.
--------------
Anni
*******
Hard work must have killed somebody
|
|
2004/10/28, 02:59 PM
I think too, a lot of it has to do with what kind of a man he is. My hubs is a boob man, so as long as "the girls" look good, the rest doesn't matter as much. If you hubs was a leg man, or a booty man, or a stomach man, it all changes how things are looked at.
|
|
2004/10/28, 04:18 PM
The key word in the question is love. If you are in love with your partner, you love everything about them, including their flaws. In my mind my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world, and I think she is sexy and she looks good naked. I would love her no matter what she looked like, because I love her.
--------------
I have a bowel movement every morning at 9:00am sharp.
|
|
2004/10/28, 04:29 PM
Hec, for once, I am proud of you, and in full agreement with you. It'll probably never happen again, so enjoy it while it lasts. :laugh:
|
|
2004/10/28, 05:42 PM
I must agree with Hec on his comment. However, even if you don't love someone but are in the act of making love with the person, in all honesty, I don't think the extra pounds is what's on the guy's mind.
Anyway, just my $0.02...
--------------
**_Robert_**
Pain is temporary; glory is forever!
E-mail: rpacheco@freetrainers.com
|
|
2004/10/28, 06:57 PM
I just asked my husband what he thought and he said it doesn't even cross his mind. We are pretty open with each other but I still find it hard to believe that a man or woman doesn't notice the "cushion pushin".
|
|
2004/10/29, 10:09 AM
I personally prefer a bit of cushion, skin an bones is no fun at all. One of the most sexy things i find in a woman is confidence no matter what their body shape or size, I like the visuals so when its insisted that all the lights are turned off and you need a call and response system to find each other in the pitch blackness my libido goes downhill. What is attractive differs from person to person.
if someone loves you they will love every aspect of you.
Lastly if im making love pretty much the last thing on my mind is a girls weight, nobodys perfect its loving the imperfections that makes a relationship.
|
|
2004/10/29, 10:40 AM
Veda,
I think that the people who have posted here are completely correct. However, there is one more detail that has not been addressed, interactivity.
I will say that I like girls with a little meat on them, and I've stated here before that weight is less important than attitude, composure, and proportion. My wife points out skinny chicks like Paris Hilton and says, "I'd like to have her body." All I can say back is, "Damn! I'd break her in two!"
The part being left out, however, is interactivity. If your partner, being male or female, isn't actively involved in the love-making, it doesn't matter if the weight 90 lbs or 300 lbs or anywhere in between.
Let it go and enjoy the moment. You know he is... :cool:
--------------
I will never grow up, just old.
Duct tape is like The Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
- Carl Zwanzig
Jonathan
|
|
2004/10/29, 11:18 AM
Veda,
I myself prefer a woman that looks like a woman not, a 12yr old boy. Woman are suppose to have curves and be soft. My wife is what is conciderd over wieght and is self concous about it to. But I find her very attactive and enjoy cuddling up with her. Her weight does not change who she is but I would like her to feel better about herself. She has a hard time believivg me when I tell her how beautiful she is and that I have never seen another woman that I would rather be with. When we are being intamint(sp) I fine that the added softness adds to her femaniness(sp). If your husband tells you that your beautiful than believe him. To him your the best and prettiest woman in the world.
|
|
2004/10/29, 11:19 AM
I have to say I was VERY apprehensive about coming back to this post as as soon as I hit the POST IT button my heart raced and I thought I must of been momentarily insane to ask such a thing - but I am glad I did, you all (thus far) have made some good comments, thank you.
And Hec, I am impressed - I wouldn't of been surprised if you gave me a bit of ribbing on this one (of course there is still time, lol!).
Maybe I have been harder on myself (and therefore my husband as he is nothing more than kind and loving and seems to be attracted to me) than I needed to be but I don't think much can cut deeper than to think the person you love is repelled by you....I guess I gotta lighten up (in more ways than one, HA!) to solve this one! Stupid insecurites!
--------------
Veda
MISERY IS OPTIONAL
***When you are up to your ears in trouble, try using the part that is not submerged.
***The difference between a dream and a goal is a plan.
HAVE A GREAT DAY!
|
