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2004/12/06, 03:56 PM
An elderly couple, Sam and Bessie, are vacationing in the West. Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly.
He walks into their room and says to his wife. "Notice anything different about me?" Bessie looks him over, "Nope". Sam says excitedly, "Come on Bessie, take a good look. Notice anything different about me?" Bessie looks again, "Nope."
Frustrated Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked except for his boots. Again he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything DIFFERENT NOW?" Bessie looks up and says, "Sam, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow."
Furious, Sam yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, BESSIE? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!"
To which Bessie replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, Sam. Shoulda bought a hat."
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2004/12/08, 08:07 PM
Good joke
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2004/12/09, 02:07 PM
Really good joke :big_smile:
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2004/12/10, 07:16 AM
An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a
purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted
on talking to the president of the Bank
because, she said, she had a lot of money.
After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right)
an employee took the elderly woman to the president's
office.
The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit.
She placed her purse on his desk and replied, "$165,000". The
president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so
much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets.
The president was surprised and asked, "What kind of bets?"
The elderly woman replied, "Well, I bet you $25,000 that your
testicles are square."
T! he president started to laugh and told the woman that it was
impossible to win a bet like that.
The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and
said, "Would you like to take my bet?"
"Certainly", replied the president. "I bet you $25,000 that my
testicles are not square."
"Done", the elderly woman answered. "But given the amount of money
involved, if you don't mind I would like to come back at 10 o'clock
tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness."
"No problem", said the president of the Bank confidently.
That night, the president became very nervous about the bet
and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his
testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over
again and again until he was positive that no one could
consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was
no way he could lose the bet.
The next morning at exactly 10 o'clock the elder! ly woman
arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and
acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day before that the
president's testicles were square.
The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one
made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to
drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.
The president was happy to oblige.
The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and
asked the president if she could touch them. "Of course", said the
president. "Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100%
sure."
The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the
president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the
wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that
and she replied, "Oh, it's probably because I bet him $100,000 that
around 10 o'clock in the morning I would be holding the balls of the
President of the Bank of Canada!"
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2004/12/10, 09:21 AM
:laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:
Excellent
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2004/12/10, 10:09 AM
LOL That's great!
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Anni
*******
Does my ass make these pants look big?
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2004/12/10, 11:47 AM
HAHA
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I am from Philadelphia, for all the people who keep posting the infamous where are you from thread.
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