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2003/12/31, 03:12 PM
A six year old girl and her four year old brother were playing upstairs before breakfast. The little boy asked his sister if she knew what cuss words were. She said, "Yeah it's like saying 'damn' or 'hell' but I don't thinks grownups like for you to say them." Then she said, "At breakfast, let's say some and see what mother will do." The little boy agreed, and down the stairs they went. The mother asked the little girl, "What do you want for breakfast?" She replied, "I'll have some of those damn Cherrios." Her mother snatched her up by the arm, and spanked her and then sent her to her room. She then turned to the little boy and said, " What would you like for breakfast." He replied, "I'm not sure, but I know the hell that I don't want any of those damn Cherrios!"
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"Get everthing you want--just make a little change now"
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2003/12/31, 03:53 PM
A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am.
The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The Foreman from the assembly line throws
open the door and begins to rant about the new employee.
He complained that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire plant behind schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides that he should see this for himself so the two men march down to the factory floor.
When they get there the line is so
backed up that there are Elmos all over the floor and they're really beginning to pile up.
At the end of the line stands the new employee.
Shehas a roll of red plush fabric and a big bag of marbles. The men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to sew the little package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter..
After several minutes of
hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches the woman.
"I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face,
"but I think you misunderstood me yesterday.
Your job is to give each Elmo two test tickles."
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If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything....
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2003/12/31, 04:11 PM
LMAO!!!!!
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Pain is but a threshold to greater strength.
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2003/12/31, 04:56 PM
Good...very good!
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Michael
Trample the weak; hurdle the dead!
Chaos, Panic, Disorder.... Yes, my work here is done!
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2004/01/02, 04:49 PM
Both....very funny!
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~Victoria~
...Do not be discouraged; everyone who got where he is, started where he was.--anon
...There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.--Beverly Sills
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2004/08/23, 09:38 AM
Reminds me of the Cosby bit about Jesus Christ and Dammit....
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