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2008/01/30, 06:20 PM
My husband is 5f 10in tall and 240 lbs. He has very unhealthy eating habits. He works 12 hrs a night and sleeps all day. He sits at a computer all night. He barely ever eats. He is getting bigger and bigger. I am concerned for his weight. He is a smoker and obese. He is a heart attack waiting to happen. He gets no exercise. We both have a membership at a gym but he does not go. I go almost everyday. I try to encourage him to come with me but he say's he is to tired. He has no energy to do anything. He works and sleeps and that is pretty much all he does.
I found a great calorie and fitness tracker on fitday.com and I was wondering If I get him to eat 2000 calories a day of healthy nutritious food, will that help him lose weight even if he does not exercise?
Any advise would be greatly appreciated. I know it is ultimately up to him but He is stubborn and not motived.
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2008/01/30, 07:10 PM
Merzz, the calories may help, but how will you get him to do that? You can't watch every morsel that goes into his mouth, especially when he is at work, or you are at work. There is nothing you can do about this. Nothing. You are right, he will have to make the decision on his own.
My hubby is just the opposite, he thinks he is scrawny (6', 170 lbs) but won't do anything about it. I've encouraged him to go to the gym with me, but the same thing. He's busy, too tired, etc. Although I am noticing him saying more and more "Man, I need to find a way to get to the gym" which I think is the first step. I hope! anyway.
All that you can do is go about your regular routine. Eventually he will catch on that he is married to a smokin' hot wife and the smokin' hot guys at the gym are noticing too! My hubby did quit smoking about a month ago and put on 10 lbs of flab around the belly. I watch the biggest loser, and FitTV like an addict. Last night for example, they showed how much sugar the contestants consume in a year's worth of soda. With my hubby's 5 Mt. Dew a day habit, he saw that and threw out all of the soda in the house. Maybe try watching some programs like that that may subconsiously show him what he is doing to his poor body.
Otherwise, it's all you. Worry about your own body, he has to worry about his. Good luck. Oh, also do a fitbuddy search about "husband" or "wife". There have been other discussions about this type of thing. Good luck!
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2008/01/30, 07:25 PM
You can talk to him till you're blue in the face, but ultimately, it's his decision. Until HE decides it's time to go, it's a losing battle.
As amy suggests, the subtle hints might work, but make sure they are subtle or he might think you're nagging him. Then he won't want to do it at all.
Maybe a nice little visit to the doctor to poke him in the right direction.
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I see the words you are typing, but all I read is *click*click*click*
Fat loss isn?t under the control of the magic fat loss fairies. - Alwyn Cosgrove
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2008/01/30, 07:25 PM
when I pack him a lunch bag for work he usually eats all of it. Tonight I packed him 1800 calories of healthy foods he can pick at all night long he promised he would eat it all. He has a fridge at work which makes this kind of easy for him. I told him I will do all the work all he has to do is eat it. I also put 2 cases of water in his car so he has access to water all night.
I am also obese but not to the extreme he is. I am 5ft 3 in and 163 lbs. I eat very healthy diet and work out at the gym 1 1/2 hrs to 2 hrs a day 5 days a week. I can't go on weekends because I work weekends 12 hrs a day and the gym opens and closes while I am at work. I do have 10 lb hand weights that I use on the weekends after work.
Maybe I will set a good example for him to follow. :)
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2008/01/30, 07:38 PM
Hopefully it works out well merzz. I would chill on the weekends if I were you. Or take a day off in the middle of the week and lift at home on the weekends one day. 5 days a week is enough.
Like Tim said, there is a fine line between being helpful and being a nag. Remember to put yourself in his shoes. If he packed a lunch for you and said "I will do all the work for you to lose weight, you just eat what I tell you", it would probably hurt your feelings and may hinder your progress.
Obviously you love him and are doing what you are doing out of love. I tapped my hubby on his belly joking about his newly developed pouch a couple nights ago. I think it's cute since he's always been thin, not considering that he may be sensitive about it. The next night he patted me on the butt and said "Wow, getting a big butt there!" OUCH! He was proving a point of course, but sometimes we need those little reminders to follow the golden rule.
Good luck. :)
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2011/09/15, 07:17 AM
My husband had his first heart attack in October 2008 just like I suspected he would if he didn't do something about his health.
He passed away this past feb from his third heart attack.
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.
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