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Group: Health & Fitness over 40

Jealous Spouse

rogerfr Posts: 5 Joined: 2005/07/19	2005/07/21, 11:44 AM This may not be the correct place to post this, but has anyone ever had to deal with this. I am new to working out and have just started. I have been running for about 10 months now and I am up to about 12 miles a week or more. I want to start weight training, that is why I came here to get an exercise plan. I was showing my wife the plan hoping she would encourage me, instead she just gave me a bunch of knocks asking me why I want to do that and who am I trying to impress. I am 42 years old and I just want to be in shape. I am not trying to impress anyone I am doing it for myself, and yes I did ask her to join me in this and she declined. I just have this feeling that every time I go to the gym she is going to question me. Has anyone ever had to deal with this type of situation before?
Lecter Posts: 249 Joined: 2005/06/04	2005/07/21, 04:23 PM Message deleted by moderator due to unsuitable content for this board.
RandomGirl Posts: 227 Joined: 2005/02/25	2005/07/21, 05:14 PM My father has dealt with the same issue as you, He's 45 and just started getting back into shape 2 yrs ago. She (my mom) was hyper-critical of his efforts at first but her insecurity is declining with time. I will say my dad has been succesfull all on his own. In 2 yrs he's lost 80 lbs and many inches and is healthy again. So keep at it, it's your health, your life. Good luck to you
rogerfr Posts: 5 Joined: 2005/07/19	2005/07/21, 10:53 PM Thank you all for your comments everyone. I appreciate your insite. And I will keep at it no matter what.:big_smile:
Lecter Posts: 249 Joined: 2005/06/04	2005/07/22, 04:01 AM Message deleted by moderator due to unsuitable content for this board.
Lecter Posts: 249 Joined: 2005/06/04	2005/07/22, 06:21 AM Message deleted by moderator due to unsuitable content for this board.
asimmer Posts: 8,201 Joined: 2003/01/07	2005/07/22, 09:59 AM Take it outside, boys. This is not the place or time for this crap. If you want to argue and insult each other, do it in your email instead of on someone else's serious post. -------------- It\'s easier to go down a hill than up it but the view is much better at the top. -Henry Ward Beecher
sstump1 Posts: 1,227 Joined: 2005/03/20	2005/07/26, 03:22 PM My wife was kind of the same way when I started. Not really jealous, but cynical about it cause she didn't think I'd keep it up. Just explain to her you want to feel better about yourself and it has nothing to do with anyone else or her for that matter but just for yourself. Also don't bug her to join you...as she see's you are successful in your attempts to be healthier she will come around. Mine's starting to...some people aren't quite ready to change their lifestyle until they reach a point where they become affected by it. Congrats to you and keep up the good work!
INTRUDER Posts: 642 Joined: 2002/06/27	2005/07/27, 07:31 PM You are only in controll of your ownself. Do it for yourself-thats all that matters. -------------- "Get everthing you want--just make a little change now" "The thing you have to realize is that you have to work for it,"
Reddy Posts: 597 Joined: 2003/09/11	2005/08/12, 04:46 PM Keep going - she may feel like you are trying to get her to lose wieght - remember to tell her that you love her (& mean it when you do) & not the I'm about to hang up the phone or walk out the door (you can say it then too but you need her to know that you really love her for the way she is) -------------- Reddy All people smile in the same language
dreichla Posts: 10 Joined: 2006/02/05	2006/02/09, 07:03 AM My wife expresses her jealousy by neglecting herself. She makes up every excuse why she won't exercise. It's funny, a while back, she was begging me to exercise together, and I wouldn't. Now, she couldn't be bothered.
	2006/02/09, 08:58 AM Drichla, lead by example, when she sees you transforming yourself in a very positive way, she may feel compelled to workout as well...some people hate following some1 else's lead, she may just 'come to the decision on her own' by seeing your results... good luck and remember it's all about consistancy....fitness is a lifelong commitment......
sstump1 Posts: 1,227 Joined: 2005/03/20	2006/02/09, 10:42 AM This is an old post, but since I posted on here my wife still won't join me. Good thing is now she's cheering me on rather then mocking whether I'm going to get up at 4:30 in the morning to go to the gym before work. Part of the change came a long time ago...but recently I've noticed a big change in her behavior towards my healthier lifestyle since I recently had my checkup and my cholesterol dropped from 324 to 185 in 9 months. She needs to get in for her physical, but I think she's scared to cause she knows the decision she's going to have to make after she does. She's not unhealthy and is rather thin and petite, but I know how she eats and I can imagine what her Dr will say to her.
	2006/02/09, 11:09 AM Somtimes it takes a combination of things to finally 'knock' a person into his/her right senses....slow but steady...your wife just might convert :) great job in getting in shape Sstump
gangstershoes Posts: 641 Joined: 2005/05/27	2006/02/15, 09:52 AM relationships are often resistant to change, because it can often show an underlying motive. In time it will become your lifestyle though, and you should always keep your independence in a relationship and not be controlled by your partner's insecurities. goodluck despite this being an old thread.
Mojo_67 Posts: 1,299 Joined: 2003/09/23	2006/02/15, 07:48 PM Jealousy...wow, what an ugly trait...I'm gonna have to come back to this. -------------- Seize the day!