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2006/11/20, 12:45 PM
HEy just wanted to see if anyone has a similar experience with this...The Majority of my family is heavy except my brother in japan, but my spouse is heavy also and seems like I get the cold shoulder for trying to workout and running/walking...she makes me feel guilty for going out for 30-40 min for my walk run I was wondering if anyone had some suggestions, encouragements, and any ideas my wife will not work out with me and will not change her eating after a week of eating salads while they chow on some burgers wings and such it makes me feel like a 3rd wheel..:( anyway thanks for the vent and maybe some future help
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Jason Fox 6\\'1\\" 365lbs Weight Goal 300 by april 2007
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2006/11/20, 01:13 PM
I'm really sorry to hear that you have absolutely no support at home, but let me say WOW, for trying to get in shape anyhow. That's awesome. Don't let anyone stop you!!!! I know you're situation makes it so much harder for you, but not impossible. I'm sure that once they see results in you they are going to want to change also. NOBODY is truely happy being fat! Lead by example and come here for the support you need. The people here are wonderful and are really able to make a difference. Hang in there, you'll be happy you did:)
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A failure establishes only this, that our determination to succeed was not strong enough.
- Christian Nestell Bovee
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2006/11/20, 05:10 PM
You need to sit down with your spouse and talk to her. Voice your concerns about her eating habits as well as her lack of exercise. Tell her that you love her very much but you're worried about her health. The key here is to focus on health issues rather than appearance.
If she's not willing to change then it will ultimately be a decision of whether you can accept her the way she is and wants to be or you will find you no longer share common goals, etc....and decide to go your separate ways. It's definitely very difficult.
Congratulations on taking the steps towards fitness...
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2006/12/05, 02:01 PM
Something Weird Happened....a good thing I have been sticking to my diet and workout schedule much more then my family thought...and I guess it finally dawned to them that this was not a fad I'm serious and I am going to get it done or die trying...so without asking nor suggestions made my wife joined me out there weight lifting I went through a little routine with her and she actually did it it was great, so now I filled out her profile and get her some weights (since i only have one weight set for dumbells) and she is starting next week, not sure about the cardio for her but this step is a huge one, mainly dont know about cardio cuz she does have a medical problem(born with a clepft? foot) so her left leg is smaller then her right BUT I WELCOME THE BONDING AND I FEEL WILL TAKE ANOTHER STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION
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Jason Fox 6'1" 380lbs Weight Goal 300 by april 2007
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2006/12/05, 02:18 PM
Great news, Jason!! With both of you helping each other, you're goals could be attained much faster. It's amazing what a little support can do for you.
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--JBennett
"I've up-ed my intensity.... now up yours!"
"Pain is only weakness leaving the body."
"Never think of how weak you are; think of how strong you're going to be."
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2006/12/05, 02:43 PM
Great news Jason. More often than not, it is easier for folks to 'stay down' than it is to come up to your level. The old cliche', misery loves company is relevant here.
However, if you stay the path, as you are seeing, then this many times actually turns them toward the light and away from the 'dark side'.
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Maximus from Gladiator....Strength and Honor!
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2006/12/05, 02:44 PM
:big_smile: Wow..that post was full of cliche's. Even Star Wars...but it is true.
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Maximus from Gladiator....Strength and Honor!
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2006/12/05, 02:55 PM
I must say I couldn't or probably wouldn't be able to do this without my husband. We signed up together at the gym. We challenge each other. Even though I must say I fall off the wagon more then he does. But it is nice to have him there to pickme up and put me back on it. I am so glad that you got support from your wife. That is great. We have a saying in our family, " We may not have it all together, But together we have it all" Good luck to both of you and thanks for all your advice.
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2006/12/05, 03:00 PM
Congratulations. By you giving positive reinforcement to your wife, you will be motivating yourself also. You might want to buy a couple of magazines that are focused on a healthy lifestyle. By this I don't mean body building or power magazines. Good Luck to both of you.
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A little discipline at the table and at the gym might help reduce that belly!
Ivan
Montreal Canada (City of Festivals)
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2006/12/05, 03:06 PM
Carivan's post is a good one. It is truly amazing how many times the proverbial 'light bulb goes off' for you when you are trying to help someone else. So many positives come from support.
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Maximus from Gladiator....Strength and Honor!
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2006/12/05, 03:08 PM
Alot of spouses suspect an underlying current in the relationship when the other starts working out, and eating better, etc. The key is to keep it up. Don't let someone break you down mentally, and be your own individual. You will see in the long-term that those who are trying to hold you back will jump on the idea later when they see your success. My advice for your wife is to swim laps at a rec center nearby. This kind of cardio, has no impact on joints, and it shouldn't have any effect on her foot. Alot of women are self conscience about their weight at a pool, but lap swim only has 8-10 people, all of which are only caring about their own performance. Good luck and I welcome both you and your wife to FT.
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2006/12/05, 03:32 PM
That's great news!!! Good Luck to both of you:big_smile:
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A failure establishes only this, that our determination to succeed was not strong enough.
- Christian Nestell Bovee
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2006/12/05, 05:31 PM
thank guys I must say the boards have supported me alot through keeping upbeat and on track a special thanks to mutt and bb1 for answering my stupid questions
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