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2007/01/30, 09:32 PM
The husband store
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City,where a women can go and choose a husband.But there are instructions at the entrance:
You may visit this store only ONCE!!There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends flights.The shopper may choose any item from any particular floor,OR may choose to continue to the next floor,but you can only go down to exit.
So a women goes to the husband store to find a husband.On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1-these men have jobs
Floor 2-these men have jobs and love kids
Floor 3-these men have jobs,love kids,and are good looking
"WOW" she thinks"I should find someone on THIS floor"but feels compelled to keep going.She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads-
Floor 4-these men have jobs,love kids,are DROP DEAD good looking,AND help with housework.
"Oh mercy ne!"she exclaims,"I can hardly stand it!!"Still,she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads-
Floor 5-these men have jobs,love kids,are drop dead gorgeous,help with housework,and have a strong romantic streak.
She is tempted to stay,but goes to the 6th floor and the sign reads
Floor 6-you are visitor number 31,456,012 to this floor.There are no men on this floor.This floor exists soley as proof that women are impossible to please.Thank you for shopping our husband floor.
To avoid any gender bias charges,the stores owner has opened a shop across the street called
The Wife Store
Floor 1-has wives that love sex
Floor 2-has wives that love sex and have money
Floors 3-6 have never been visited.......
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"But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold"
My Wish
Rascall Flats
I sing this song to my kids...but I realized..it works for yall too....
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2007/01/30, 09:37 PM
:laugh::laugh::laugh: Still laughing I'll be back to laugh again....Thats great .. But i think I might have stopped at 2 :laugh:
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A** kissing only works if you know which one to kiss.
If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise. ~Author Unknown
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2007/01/30, 10:06 PM
Love it!
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2007/01/30, 10:22 PM
HER DIARY:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans
to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day
long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but
he made no comment on it.
Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere
quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.
I asked him what was wrong; he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it
was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had
nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.
On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly,
and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he
didn't say, "I love you, too."
When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he
wanted nothing to do with me any! more. He just sat there quietly, and
watched TV.
He continued to seem distant and absent.
Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed.
About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to
my caress, and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted,
and his thoughts were somewhere else.
He fell asleep - I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that
his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
HIS DIARY:
Missed a big deer today, but at least I got laid.....
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Sometimes life is like herding cats.
Charlie
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2007/01/30, 10:27 PM
Okay, so why couldn't he just tell her that he missed a deer? Big deal! Because...she wouldn't understand???
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2007/01/31, 08:56 AM
Oh Charlie. Thats funny guys are so crazy like that too.... :laugh:
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A** kissing only works if you know which one to kiss.
If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise. ~Author Unknown
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2007/01/31, 08:56 AM
Message deleted by moderator due to unsuitable content for this board.
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2007/01/31, 09:23 AM
Women have to be complicated so that men don't self destruct, I say.
In the spirit of letting man be man...I decided one time that I would spend a whole week doing nothing but feeding and sexing mine, which, is every man's dream, right? After four days he accused me of not caring about him, that he felt like a roommate / sex buddy....??!!??
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A morning without coffee is like something without something else.
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2007/01/31, 11:36 AM
Yeah, I think guys are the complicated ones.
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2007/01/31, 01:09 PM
Maybe you'll like this one netter msm.
Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten
men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so
they decided that one had to leave, because otherwise they were all going
to fall.
They weren't able to designate a person, until the woman
gave a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go
of the rope, because as a woman, she was used to giving up everything for
her husband and kids, or for men in general, and she was used to always
making sacrifices, with little in return.
As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started
clapping.
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Sometimes life is like herding cats.
Charlie
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2007/01/31, 01:31 PM
:laugh: You're right...much better! :big_smile:
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2007/01/31, 01:34 PM
Never let it be said I'm not an equal opportunity kind of guy. :big_smile:
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Sometimes life is like herding cats.
Charlie
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