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the hardest thing...

the_cupcake Posts: 348 Joined: 2004/06/16	2004/07/18, 10:32 PM that I've ever had to do in my life is to stand here, do my everyday thing while my boyfriend grieves his dad. It sucks being continents away and not be able to hug and just keep him in my arms when I know that's the only thing both him and I need right now. It kills me that I can only hear his voice in that strained guttural way, that he's terribly broken and I'm nowhere near to even help him. I ache for the fact that I'm not there when he needs me most. He stands strong for his family, but I'm not there when I need to be his brick wall. I know that no amount of emails or phone calls can equate with a single tight embrace. It just freakin kills me. -------------- The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it. Now for the love of god...put the donut...DOWN!!! -cupcake-
howdiekat Posts: 1,345 Joined: 2003/05/22	2004/07/18, 10:54 PM cupcake, i'm so sorry for your boyfriend's loss and for the turmoil you're in over not being able to be with him. i can't imagine how hard that is, but know that we're thinking of both of you. will you be able to see him anytime soon? -------------- i wish you ill, ice-t. margarine is a liar who announces, \"i am butter!\"
the_cupcake Posts: 348 Joined: 2004/06/16	2004/07/18, 11:04 PM not in another half a year. gotta finish things here first. Thanks howdie. Just had to share it, bottling it up sucks. thank you for the kind sentiments. -------------- The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it. Now for the love of god...put the donut...DOWN!!! -cupcake-
Damselfly Posts: 128 Joined: 2004/06/27	2004/07/18, 11:05 PM Awwww cupcake I'm so sorry to hear of this news! Take care and do the best you can long distance. I hope you two can be together soon. -------------- Damselfly Whoever said that sunshine brings happiness never danced in the rain. \\"unknown\\"
howdiekat Posts: 1,345 Joined: 2003/05/22	2004/07/18, 11:43 PM hang in there cupcake. i know that's the tritest thing i could possibly say, but you're an incredibly strong woman and you're going to make it through this. i'm always here for you to vent to. -------------- i wish you ill, ice-t. margarine is a liar who announces, \"i am butter!\"
phimugirl1 Posts: 267 Joined: 2004/06/22	2004/07/19, 08:37 AM I'm so sorry for your boyfriend's loss and the pain you are feeling by not being able to be with him during this time of grief. I hope that you two will be able to be with one another sooner than expected.
t-babe Posts: 441 Joined: 2003/02/20	2004/07/19, 03:04 PM sorry to hear about the hard time your boyfriend is having. grief is a terrible thing and I'm sure you're doing all you can and being a great support to him. hope the vent helped.
Vedakathryn Posts: 1,585 Joined: 2004/05/28	2004/07/19, 05:05 PM Please accept my sympathies for your boyfriend's loss. I am sorry you are having trouble with him so far from you...I am sure you are in his heart and he can feel you there each moment as he is in yours...hugs, cupcake... -------------- Veda MISERY IS OPTIONAL ***When you are up to your ears in trouble, try using the part that is not submerged. ***The difference between a dream and a goal is a plan. HAVE A GREAT DAY!
bobosensei Posts: 194 Joined: 2004/06/15	2004/07/26, 11:19 AM hey cupcake i lost my dad when i was 14 and i think what was best for me was to just know someone was there. i had a friend who slept on the floor of the hospital next to me for 3 nights and just knowing that he cared enough to be there meant more than anything else. there were tons of people who came to talk to me or to see how i was doing, but in the end just always being there even when there was no talking was what helped the most. these things take time. it's been 8 years and i am just starting the therapy i needed to have. i was in shock for many years. be forgiving of your boyfriend right now, and make sure he gets extra help if he needs it.
ravage Posts: 12 Joined: 2004/07/27	2004/07/30, 01:31 AM My friend's mom is fighting cancer. It's the second time and this time it looks like the cancer will win. There is nothing I can do exept stand by and watch him fall apart. He has already lost is dad to cancer. Saying anything seems empty and meaningless and just "being there" doensn't seem like enough. I am truley sorry you cannot be there with your boyfriend. It must be incredible hard. "Well here I am. I don't know how to say this. Only thing I know is awkward silence"- Saves the Day
Carivan Posts: 8,542 Joined: 2002/01/20	2004/07/30, 09:47 AM My thoughts go out to you and your boyfriend cupcake. Hang in thier and give someone you know a big hug! -------------- "A will finds a way, failure is not an option" Ivan carivan@freetrainers.com Montreal Canada
the_cupcake Posts: 348 Joined: 2004/06/16	2004/07/30, 10:09 AM thanks carivan, ravage and bobosensei It's hard even when phoning and emailing but I have to have faith in him, that he'll be strong enough to last. I try so hard to be there in the ways that I can be and I hope that is enough for now. I hope that he feels it from halfway around the world. Thank you so much for your support and your help. -------------- The best victories are won not by adversity and brute force. Learn the enemy and overcome it. Now for the love of god...put the donut...DOWN!!! -cupcake-