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2007/09/12, 11:52 AM
So as most of you know I am a server and have been most of my life...I see people and how they interact with eachother on a daily basis...and always know when I couple truely likes eachother and doesn't...couples that like eachother are very involved in their own conversations and are happy to be out together alone with no kids to interupt and genuinly enjoy eachothers company...then theres the folks that come in and stare anywhere but at eachother are silent and are always in a hurry to get their food...why they even go out to eat is a mystery..I had a couple come in last night...I knew right off they were not fond of eachother...so I try and hurry things along...I see her up front talking to a manager...that manager comes back and says she's upset her food is takeing so long...so I pull the ticket it had been 18 minutes since I ordered...hello lady its chicken..it has to cook...if you want food poisoning I can arrange that...and surprise...you aren't the only guest dineing with us...so that brings me to...what kind of couple are you when you go out...if you don't like to wait and enjoy the company of your partner...here's a tip...go to McDonalds...no waiting...if you truely enjoy being out and love the company of who you are with....be thankful...it's rare.
Here's another tip just for fun...
Guys...if you're going to be an ahole and flirt with your server in front of your significant other...don't give the check to her...she never tips...and if you didn't already look like a big enough ahole...now the whole restaraunt knows and will remember you when you come back.
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2007/09/12, 12:04 PM
LOL KC, I am not a server and have also noticed that behavior in couples, not only eating but also in a car. She will be looking out the window and no conversation. My first marriage was like that, he would flirt with all the servers (female) and at times I think he didn't even know I was sitting there. He fit your profile of an AHOLE.
My hubby now of 8 years is the best!! He makes sure he focus on me and constantly carries on a conversation.
BTW, I never let the first ahole I married effect the amount of tip I left for the server. But then again, I was aware of his ahole status!
Debbie
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Success is not for the chosen few but rather for the few who choose it.
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2007/09/12, 12:20 PM
LOL - Great observations!!! I love people watching. It can be entertaining and educational. KC, it sounds like you could even be a couples counselor with all your knowledge!! :)
I have to say, we are a "strange couple". We are togehter 24/7. When we get done with work, we may stop to eat and may not talk, but that is because we are tired from work or in our own "mindspace" after working all day together.
I have seen the couples that you describe though.
Mel
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2007/09/12, 12:57 PM
People watching at its best!
As for what type of couple we are...
alarm clock goes off... he rolls over gives me a kiss...I know I get to snooze for 15 until he is out of the shower and brings me my coffee... with another kiss. I then get asked if I want him to fix me something for breakfast. We kiss when we leave.. I usually see and or talk to him within 2 hours.. have lunch together most days... talk a few more times... both home when one of us picks up kiddo either at 3 or 4:30. One or the other fixes dinner... we eat together, usually at the bar, and we are usually in the bed by 9-10 pm. We spend ALOT of time together..He is 16 yrs my senior so I figure we have to now.. we may not get much time later.
Nah... I am VERY lucky. I am married to my best friend.. we, like all couples, have our issues but he is the best hubby I could have asked for!
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Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. Security does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than exposure.---Helen Keller
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2007/09/12, 01:28 PM
The hubby and I are more apt to go out for a few drinks than dinner. We typically sit at the bar and sociallize with the bar tender and others at the bar. Probably explains why I find it so hard to drop these last 10lb-lol. We enjoy each others company (most of the time) and spend most of our "free" time together (however between work, my fitness addiction, and kids, there aint alot of free time)! Is our relationship perfect...hell no...but after 20 years of marriage (+5 years of living together) I'm happy to still have the same kind of fun we had when we met.
Oh ya, we're also great tippers!! I think if we stopped going to our local pub, they'd go out of business:)
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Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.
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The harder you fall, the higher you bounce
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2007/09/12, 01:52 PM
Kudos to you for being a server for so long, it must take quite a lot of personal fortitude to deal with the masses all day like that. I know I'd snap in about 15 minutes doing that.
But if a male is taking his other half out to dinner and gives HER the check, that puts him in a-hole status on its own... Does that really happen all that often? I've never seen it likely because I've never done it.
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This is SPARTA!!!
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2007/09/12, 02:01 PM
Agreed Fly, we enjoy the companionable silence often in restaurants and while in the car that comes from 28 years together. Silence isn't necessarily hostile. And jeez immovable, you're saying I'm an asshole if my wallet's empty and my wife pays? Our money is ours. We share. I don't even carry a checkbook.
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From aboard MV The Shop
Johns Island
Charlie
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2007/09/12, 04:26 PM
Ah no, I was speaking from outside the marriage box, as I've never ventured into that frightening labyrinth :) I've only lived in sin, lol.
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Quoting from charlie826:
Agreed Fly, we enjoy the companionable silence often in restaurants and while in the car that comes from 28 years together. Silence isn't necessarily hostile. And jeez immovable, you're saying I'm an asshole if my wallet's empty and my wife pays? Our money is ours. We share. I don't even carry a checkbook.
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This is SPARTA!!!
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2007/09/13, 07:48 PM
You can tell when its a comfortable silence...there's comfort in the body language...and the uncomfortable God can we please get this over with is all together another body language.
ALOT of women pay now adays...I am very old fashioned....even when I was married I never pulled out my card to pay the bill..but thats just me.Our money was ours no doubt...but when it came to going out to eat I have never picked up the check...tipped...but never paid...
probably why I've never dated much:big_smile:
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2007/09/13, 07:56 PM
I guess im old fashioned also, i still believe in opening/holding doors, paying for dinner, rubbing feet, buying flowers for no reason, leaving lil notes or calling just to say those words. Time is of the essence, why spent it wih someone that you dont love with every shred of your life ?
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Get busy living or get busy dying.
Rabula Tasa- Latin meaning Clean Slate
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2007/09/13, 08:07 PM
My thoughts exactly bill!!!!!:love:
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2007/09/13, 08:11 PM
I actually had a guy tell his wife she couldn't have dessert because she was fat enough already...right in front of me...why that women didnt slap im in his head and walk out is beyond me...
you would be surprised the things people put up with...and its not just women.
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2007/09/13, 08:17 PM
You two get a room. This is a little nauseating.
How about I take you both out to dinner, pick up the check and tip, hold the door for you, boot you down the steps, whisper "sorry" sweetly, send you a get well card with flowers. K?:big_smile: Old fashioned enough?
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From aboard MV The Shop
Johns Island
Charlie
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2007/09/13, 08:22 PM
You boot me down the stairs and you'll need your own get well card darlin':big_smile:
But you can take me to dinner and pick up the check...
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2007/09/13, 08:27 PM
You'll be alright, I'll make sure you land on Bill. He's old fashioned, he won't mind.
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From aboard MV The Shop
Johns Island
Charlie
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2007/09/13, 09:08 PM
and ive got plenty of cushion fir her to land on :big_smile:
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Get busy living or get busy dying.
Rabula Tasa- Latin meaning Clean Slate
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2007/09/14, 06:55 PM
We are an equal couple. I cook and do laundry, he washes the dishes and cleans the house. The few times we can afford to go out, we always have things to talk about but the comfortable silence is fine too. We have a dog we can't really leave hone alone, except for a few hours, so we like to be able to go to places that accepts dogs. Those places aren't very common. Then again, I love to cook, and I'm good at it, so...
The other day he said he didn't like women with big biceps, but if he had to choose between flabby arms or big biceps, he'd take the biceps! Just love him!:love:
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Getting there...
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2007/09/16, 05:23 PM
yeah i'd have to say even though i think my partner is old, arrogant and crazy! with no dress sense we are able to get along just fine alone or whatever. last night we went to bed early and couldn't sleep so just talked in the dark for ages about things that happened at work or whatever it was really nice.
and if that was my guy flirting with the waitress i woulda kicked his arse right there in front of everybody.
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2007/09/16, 07:19 PM
I am working hard to get in great physical shape, and she is not interested in that, but my wife's strengths compliment my weaknesses and vice versa. We have a lot of fun; we don't sweat the small stuff, and we have 2 fantastic kids. We have made it through losing a baby, my open heart surgery, and many other trials together of the past 21 years of knowing each other and 18 years of marriage, not to mention my insane work schedule. Kaye and I are at the point now where we are comfortable with the fact that we don't have to be interested in the same things to be married to each other.
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2007/09/20, 10:28 PM
Oh geez, me too. But even just after 2 1/2 years together... all that stuff is out the window. :(
In fact, we were engaged, and he broke that off. It's been quite a week for me. We're still together, and we're working on things. We just don't see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. Granted, I'm young, but I have a lot of life experiences already... and I do believe he's my soulmate. We're best friends and I've known him half my life. I just wish he'd do the old fashioned things guys used to do?
I'd like to deem those 'relationship manners'!
Sigh.
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Quoting from bill06:
I guess im old fashioned also, i still believe in opening/holding doors, paying for dinner, rubbing feet, buying flowers for no reason, leaving lil notes or calling just to say those words. Time is of the essence, why spent it wih someone that you dont love with every shred of your life ?
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2007/09/20, 10:43 PM
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Quoting from raerae224:
We just don't see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. Granted, I'm young, but I have a lot of life experiences already... Sigh.
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Its all about compromise and learning to love the differences in one another rae, nobodys perfect, but if you are willing to give things a chance, you'll be blessed by what i believe to be the sole purpose we are here, true, unbridled, undying love. Hang in there, he'll realize soon enough what hes got and come around, us men can be a little slow, just ask Mutt....:laugh:
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Get busy living or get busy dying.
Rabula Tasa- Latin meaning Clean Slate
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2007/09/20, 10:54 PM
I appreciate your kind words. I just want things to be like I think they should be, the lovey notes, the flowers... he just forgets that those things are just as important to me. But most importantly, I enjoy his presence when it's just the two of us. He's my best friend.
He knows that losing me would be the most regretful thing he could do. I just hope it doesn't take too long for him to realize.
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2007/09/21, 11:08 AM
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Quoting from raerae224:
... he just forgets that those things are just as important to me. =============
Well give him a little reminder then, like i said, we can be a little slow when it comes to romance. :big_smile:
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Get busy living or get busy dying.
Rabula Tasa- Latin meaning Clean Slate
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2007/09/21, 03:01 PM
LOL...I'm not even sure what a "couple" is anymore...I've been single for sooooo long.
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2007/09/25, 12:01 PM
I too have noticed the same when it comes to couples and am now married to a hopeless romantic. Who says chivalry is dead. It's very much alive in my husband. I have also noticed a difference between how men treat women according to geographic location. Men in the South or West part of this great country treat women with more respect than those of the Northeast. I can say this because I grew up in the Northeast and have traveled all over the country. My last boyfriend before my now husband was from the northeast and when I said something to him about opening doors and all that he acted like it would kill him. I've been living in Texas now for the last 4 years and have had more doors opened for me and hats tipped for me than I ever dreamed possible before moving here. So ladies, tell your men to take lessons!
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2007/09/25, 12:33 PM
What do you do if your wife is a fast walker and gets to the door before you do?
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From aboard MV The Shop
Johns Island
Charlie
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2007/09/25, 04:06 PM
I think the world would be a much nicer place if everyone treated each other with more respect. I hold doors for people, say hello as I pass people, say excuse me, thank you and your welcome. We've taught our children the same basic manners and they treat friends and strangers alike with the same respect. It's not just the men that need to treat women with respect. Just my 2 cents...So Charlie, no worries, with any luck she'll hold the door open for you..just don't take to long gettin there though or you're SOL.
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2007/09/25, 04:37 PM
We're not all like that up here in the Northeast ;)
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Quoting from spoiledbrat6887:
I too have noticed the same when it comes to couples and am now married to a hopeless romantic. Who says chivalry is dead. It's very much alive in my husband. I have also noticed a difference between how men treat women according to geographic location. Men in the South or West part of this great country treat women with more respect than those of the Northeast. I can say this because I grew up in the Northeast and have traveled all over the country. My last boyfriend before my now husband was from the northeast and when I said something to him about opening doors and all that he acted like it would kill him. I've been living in Texas now for the last 4 years and have had more doors opened for me and hats tipped for me than I ever dreamed possible before moving here. So ladies, tell your men to take lessons!
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This is SPARTA!!!
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2007/09/25, 05:38 PM
Fly, she has trained me not to shove people off the dock as I walk home to the boat even though it's funny as hell. I also have taken to using silverware again. She says that's much more romantic than fingers or pouring from the bowl directly to my mouth. I am also in charge of all the smelly under the floor stuff from the engines to the gas and holding tanks. She really thinks that's romantic.
But the real secret is late at night I tuck her in and tell her I love her...
after I dry her off from shioving her in the water. It's worked well for 27 years eh?
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From aboard MV The Shop
Johns Island
Charlie
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